A blog for all those who are afraid: to try new things, to face scary situations, to admit failure, to pursue success, to meet new people, etc, and etc, and etc....
I'm absolutely thrilled to join the community over at Homeschool Survival as one of Sarah's staff writers.
This month, our emphasis is, as you can probably guess, back to school advice. My column addresses the common issues that bring on panic among newbie homeschoolers.
I've got 10 tips to help you avoid breathing into a paper bag! Join me there, won't you? To do so, click the link below.
A young mom, barely out of her teens, sits with three babies
under the age of six. She wilts beneath the withering control of her second
baby daddy. It is obvious which ones are his because the little girl cannot
escape his soul-killing tirades. Inwardly, I weep.
I watch him and know that he is doing all he knows to do – the pitiful best he
can against even more pitiful odds.
They wander near me. I say, “Shush. Shush,” in my most newborn-soothing
tone. “You are working so hard to be a good daddy. She is such a sweet little
girl. Relax. She is fine. She hasn’t made a peep. Let her breathe. You take a
breath too. How long has it been since you simply took a breath?”
Behind him, I see Baby Mamma’s eyes fill and glisten with tears she’s fighting to
hold back. “Thank you,” she mouths without a sound.
Courtesy Mad Penguin Creative
The pleading in her eyes says volumes more. All these
months later, her desperate, pleading gaze haunts my dreams. And, I wonder, who
is telling her what it takes to succeed?
I wish. I wish I could gather them under my wing and
listen to their stories. How have they found themselves in this hard pressed life
they are living? Who gave them the map that said this way of life was the road
to success?
I look around and ponder images of success: the rock
and movie stars, YouTube sensations, and techno-wizards. I think of the infamous
living life out loud, Kardashian, Honey-Boo-Boo, and 16 and Pregnant style. Is
this what success looks like?
Courtesy B. Creasy
If I saw Baby Mamma and Daddy again, I would gather
them under my wing and tell them what success really looks like.
1)
Success is rarely lived out loud in the pages of tabloids or on the television screen.
It happens in the quiet moments of life when no one anywhere is watching.
Micah 6:8 (Message) But he’s already made it plain how to live,
what to do, what God is looking for in men and women. It’s quite simple: Do
what is fair and just to your neighbor, be compassionate and loyal in your
love, and don’t take yourself too seriously—take God seriously.
2)
Know that you have value beyond anything you can imagine. You are not here by
accident. A creator God gave you purpose before he made the world.
c. 1997
Psalm 139: 15-16 (Message) You know exactly how I was made, bit by
bit, how I was sculpted from nothing into something. Like an open book, you
watched me grow from conception to birth; all the stages of my life were spread
out before you, The days of my life all prepared before I’d even lived one day.
3) You have a purpose to fulfill. In the
history of all mankind, only you can fulfill that mission. You are not a
mistake.
Ephesians 2:10 (NET) For we are his workmanship, having been
created in Christ Jesus for good works that God prepared beforehand so we may
do them.
4)
Even if no one in your life has ever been trustworthy, there is someone you can
trust. Be trustworthy because he is trustworthy.
Courtesy Mad Penguin Creative
Psalm 37: 3-5 (NRSV) Trust in the Lord, and do good; so you will
live in the land, and enjoy security. Take delight in the Lord, and he will
give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him,
and he will act.
5)
Embrace hard work knowing others will respect you for it. Laziness brings
dishonor and robs you of self-respect.
Ephesians 4:28 (Amplified)Let the
thief steal no more, but rather let him be industrious, making an honest living with his own hands, so that he may be able to give to those in
need.
Proverbs 6: 6-8 (Message) You lazy fool, look at an ant. Watch it
closely; let it teach you a thing or two. Nobody has to tell it what to do. All
summer it stores up food; at harvest it stockpiles provisions.
Courtesy Mad Penguin Creative
6)
If you won’t do it for someone else, don’t expect it to be done for you. Treat
others the way you expect to be treated.
Matthew 7:12 (Message) Here is a simple, rule-of-thumb guide for
behavior: Ask yourself what you want people to do for you, then grab the
initiative and do it for them.
7)
Love fearlessly and know that if you are fearful, your love is not real.
1 John 4:18 (NASB) There is no fear in love; but perfect love
casts out fear, because fear involves punishment, and the one who fears is not
perfected in love.
8) Do
not be selfish. Recognize selfishness when you see it, and run like your hair
is on fire when you do.
Proverbs 23: 6-8 (NASB) Do
not eat the bread of a selfish man, or desire his delicacies; For as he thinks
within himself, so he is. He says to you, “Eat and drink!” But his heart is not
with you. You will vomit up the morsel you have eaten, and waste your compliments.
Courtesy A. Squires
9)
Know that God gave you the ability to recognize right and wrong. Do what you
know is right even if no one else will.
(Amplified Bible) Abstain from evil [shrink
from it and keep aloof from it] in whatever form or whatever kind it may be.
10)
Be gracious, respectful, and mannerly toward total strangers. Hold doors for
young women, mothers, and the elderly. Say thank you. Let the other driver go
first in traffic just because. Pay it forward.
Philippians 2:3 (NASB) Do nothing from selfishness or empty
conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than
yourselves;
Courtesy B. Creasy - 2010
I will always wonder
about that young, struggling, not-quite-couple in the doctor’s office. What would you tell them success looks like?
The cry was long, slow, and mournful. It was the kind
you hear when a soul is watching and waiting for authenticity it cannot find.
The thread long since faded from Facebook. Yet, it echoes
in my heart. A Christian left his sprinkler system running despite a prohibitive
county ordinance. He was a serial offender. I winced.
The post dripped with righteous and justifiable sarcasm.
And, as Facebook does, one comment invited another.
It was like a train wreck I couldn’t stop watching. I
didn’t want to keep reading and being embarrassed by ‘my kind’, but I couldn’t
look away.
I watched the stories unfold. I read as far as the one
about a high powered, fancy car driving, preacher-man who routinely ran a
four-way stop in his community.
Courtesy A. Squires
I smiled wryly thinking about mobsters who got away
with murder – until tiny little numbers did them in. It was racketeering, not
murder, which unraveled their empires.
I wondered how the offenders would have reacted had
they known they were on Facebook display. Would they have been chastened and
repentant? Would they have been arrogant and entitled?
What’s the use of living a big, public faith if the Devil
is in the details? You see what I mean, right? I wonder how I measure up when
others are reconciling my faith.
When I offer up my tattered faith, will it resonate as
true and trustworthy? Will I only provide more Facebook fodder for those
Courtesy Mad Penguin Creative
who
are waiting and watching for authenticity? If perfection is required, I’m lost
in the noise of failure.
We’ve stitched up the broken places of our life until
all that’s left is a rag tag survival quilt. I pull the tatters close like a
mother relishing shreds of the last baby blanket left in the house.
There is no sweet smell in which to bury my nose. No
corner remains to rub against the weary cheeks of my soul. I look in the mirror,
and mocking thoughts echo back.
You. You and your broken life. The legacy of your brokenness will
last long after you are gone. Why do you keep trying? Who is this God before
whom you weep? Where is he now? Who’s gonna buy the authenticity of your faith?
Loser.
The chiding voice says my faith must be spit-polished to
shiny perfection for authenticity’s sake. No one in this Photoshopped magazine
spread, Pinterest happy world wants to hear about a broken down, weary, sweaty,
hard fought for, tenacious faith. N.o.b.o.d.y.
Courtesy Mad Penguin Creative
Yet, I look around me at the bloody landscape of a
dying world. A world that is clamoring and gasping for spiritual authenticity. Watching
so closely they know when we run a four way or leave a sprinkler churning and
spinning day after illegal day.
I try to think of someone I know whose life is without
pain or crisis. Someone whose life is Pinterest or Kardashian beautiful.
The truth is sobering. I am not alone. Every single
Christian I know who is living a life of authentic faith is hurting for one
reason or another. None of the wounds are easy fixes. We are all living out our
faith in the trenches. Trench warfare is neither easy nor pretty. Nor pinnable.
I wonder who is watching when I am unaware. When the
Devil creeps into the details of my life, will a soul gasping for authenticity
cry out, “A-ha! I gotcha!” and sit back smug and self-satisfied because I have
lived down to his or her lowest expectations?
Courtesy Mad Penguin Creative
When I tell the truth that faith is work and often
yields no immediate reward, will the words resonate in a life giving way? Will
the authenticity of my faith take root and grow in someone else’s life?
I am living a broken and imperfect life and faith in
the midst of world that is dying for authenticity. If you think you are too
broken to be fixed, you are not alone. Walk with me?
Courtesy B. Creasy - 2010
Romans 12:1-2 (The Message)
So here’s what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary
life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it
before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing
you can do for him. Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit
into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You’ll be
changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and
quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down
to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops
well-formed maturity in you.
My dog Daisy has
a stubborn streak. You can see it in the defiant lift of her head.
Image Credit - B. Pensinger
Within the
confines of our backyard fence, I am boss. She is completely obedient. But when
we step out into the wide world, Daisy likes to tune me out.
There was a time
when I used to walk her around the neighborhood without a leash. I’m not sure
what happened, but the hound in her mutt blood must’ve won out and she started
chasing anything with four legs and fur. Needless to say, she’s back under
leash arrest. This doesn’t make me happy. I like it when she’s obedient so she
can trot freely beside me, sniffing recycle bins and cat poop to her hearts
content.
Image Credit - Beth Pensinger
If she takes a
#2 while I have her on the leash, I make her sit before I bend down to clean it
up. Poo patrol is a nasty business made only worse by Daisy potentially
jeopardizing my already klutzy center of gravity. So the other night after she
took care of business, I told her to sit.
Nothin.
I tried to
imitate a man’s deep voice and barked the command a few more times.
Nada. So I
grabbed her by the snout and forced her to lock eyes with mine.
“Sit.” I said
through clenched teeth.
The only
movement she made was to try to wrestle her face out of my iron grip. I was ahead
in the staring competition, but that was about it. Suddenly, I laughed. This
was a battle of wills, and I was going to
win.
“Oh girl,” I
said. “I could do this all night.” Thankfully
not long after, she waved her white flag.
I was consumed
with the showdown for the remainder of our walk. I am often made aware of scary
parallels between me and my dog and me and God. Only I’m Daisy and God takes my
place.
Image Credit - Beth Pensinger
In this
particular parallel, I think God is happy when I’m obedient so I can trot
freely beside Him. He takes no pleasure in placing me under leash arrest. But
when I consistently tune Him out, what else can I expect? He knows if I chase
the cat, I’ll end up at a very busy and dangerous highway that’s not to be
trifled with.
Yet I continue
to be stubborn once on the leash. He tells me to do something and I refuse. He
locks eyes with mine and we engage in a battle of wills. He repeats His command—hopefully
not through clenched teeth—and I look
away.
“Oh daughter,”
He says. “I could do this all night.”
He’s so right.
“My son, do not
make light of the Lord’s discipline, and do not lose heart when he rebukes you,
because the Lord disciplines those he loves, and he punishes everyone he
accepts as a son.”
I am so thankful for Beth's friendship, inspiration, and encouragement since meeting her in May of 2012 at Blue Ridge Mountains Christian Writers Conference.
It was my pleasure to help critique her newly published book, Let Me Fall. She is certainly no dimwit. The story of her journey with God is an engrossing one.
She has a passion for young women who will identify with the struggles she unravels in this insightful offering. If you or someone you know loves a good Romance novel, this book is probably for you - and not for the reasons you think!
I was going about my complicated life thinking
complicated thoughts when the
Courtesy D. Horrocks
Moore, Oklahoma tornado hit. In an instant, my
life seemed much less complicated. How about you?
I cannot wrap my head around recreating life from
rubble that looks like a box of spilled matchsticks.
My community of bloggers and I began to wonder what we
could do and how. My friend, Tabitha, suggested a campaign to highlight the
work of Samaritan’s Purse which quickly moved into the area to assist in
recovery.
Samaritan’s Purse is the parent organization for
Operation Christmas Child. Many of you have probably packed shoe boxes at
Christmas bound for children overseas.
I enjoyed three wonderful
years working with OCC training volunteers who were preparing the boxes for
overseas shipping. Knowing the organization like I do, I quickly signed on for
the suggested campaign.
The news cycle is shifting. The recovery has only
begun. I wonder how quickly I'd feel forgotten after the satellite trucks move
on to the next big story.
Today, my blogging community and I would like to invite you to reach out and touch Oklahoma from where ever you are. Every dollar contributed goes to the two organizations linked below. You choose your recipient organization. Won't you share this post with everyone you know?
The devastation in the United State's Midwest region breaks our hearts, and the Inspired Bloggers Network desires to use our influence and the power of our blogs to make a difference.
“Our prayers are with all of those who are suffering because of this massive storm. We are going to stand by them and do everything we can to help them recover physically, emotionally and spiritually.” - Samaritan’s Purse President Franklin Graham
Volunteers are already in action and more help is needed. Please consider donating your time to Samaritan's Purse and if you are not available to serve physically, keep those who are working in your prayers.
Contribute
If you are Inspired to Help, please make a donation to either Samaritan's Purse or the American Red Cross to support their relief efforts in Texas and Oklahoma and help us track our impact by marking the amount you donated in the form below. If you would like, you can let us know you joined our effort by commenting on one of our blogs listed below.
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The following bloggers are all participating in the Inspired to Help campaign by posting a call to give on their blogs on Memorial Day... Monday, May 27th.
Please visit one or all of these blogs for their personal thoughts on the Inspired to Help campaign.
What is the Inspired Bloggers Network?
The Inspired Bloggers Network is a group of over 250 women bloggers of various niches, backgrounds, and experiences but all are united as they seek to support and encourage one another while growing their blogs in order to impact the world in a positive way.
Are you are pumped over the early arrival of next year’s
curriculum? Maybe you are wondering if you’ll finish this year’s work in time
to start again next fall.
Homeschool conventions are an invaluable resource for both the confident and
struggling homeschool family. The return on investment of time, energy, and
cost to attend a conference is exponential.
Wondering what a conference has to offer?
1) Conventions are like huge family reunions. Whether
your family is large with lots of littles or small with only a couple of teens,
you will know you’ve found your tribe. Everyone gets you. There is nothing to
explain. It’s fun to catch up with old friends and to make new ones.
2) Vendor halls provide direct communication with
curriculum experts. There’s nothing like a face-to-face conversation with curriculum
providers while you peruse their products. You’ll have the chance to talk to
other families who’ve used what you’re salivating over. Between the two, you
will feel empowered to make better curriculum decisions for the year ahead.
3) Workshops offer a variety of topics meaning you
will be encouraged and reassured in a variety of ways. Conferences release
schedules ahead of time. Take the time to look them over, and define the types
of workshops offered. Map out a preliminary plan of the ones that seem to
resonate with you. Be flexible as sessions sometimes fill up, or speaker line
ups change at the last minute.
4) Sessions topics vary widely but typically include
information about the following subjects: vendor product lines, parenting/marriage enrichment, special needs concerns, practical ‘how to’ ideas, entrepreneurial opportunities, budgeting/financial support, time management, transcript prep, College Board testing, and tracks specifically for teens and
children.
In addition to mapping out your session interest list,
there are other things you can do to prepare for a successful conference.
1) Expect to be overwhelmed if it is your first conference.
Plan crockpot or make ahead casserole
meals for your return home. Make two days before and after the
conference teacher work days. Use the ones before to get your
house in order. Use the ones after to rest up, refocus,
regroup and, of course, do laundry.
2) Invite a few friends to go along. We always
feel lessoverwhelmed if we know there will be
a friendly face in thecrowd.
3) Check the website for food/snack policies and
providers beforeyou go. Some conferences
are more flexible than others aboutbringing outside food in to the venue.
Knowing the policies andvendors represented, you can make a plan that
works for yourfamily.
4) Check the website vendor list and research
curriculum youwant to see when you arrive.
Have your list of questions readybecause reps will be eager to answer them.
5) Don’t be shy. Speak to strangers. The mom next to you at the vendor booth may have the
information you need. The mom seated next to you may live in
your community and have children the same ages as yours. Can
you say, “Park day!”
6) It’s o.k. to take a breather when information
overload hits.Most conferences record sessions and
offer copies for aminimal fee.
7) If you travel, plan your packing to include room
for purchasesmade while at the convention. Plan your budget before you arrive lest you get carried away and
overspend. After all, homeschoolers never meet a book they
didn’t love, right?
8) Expect to return home energized and equipped for
newchallenges ahead. Don’t
forget to share your new found enthusiasm with friends who didn’t
get to attend.
9) Consult your state’s homeschool organization for
a list ofconferences in your area.
Most states have multiple listings of local and state wide conferences
and book sales, and many will take place in the next couple of
months.
If you are looking for a great regional conference,
consider Teach
Them Diligently. In addition to conferences in Nashville and
Omaha, TTD is hosting a variety of upcoming ‘marketplace’ place events. There
is sure to be one near you.
To check out TTD’s upcoming
conferences, click the link below.
I am desperate and cannot breathe. I am not alone.
Perhaps you have many little feet pattering around your
home while taking care of an aging grandfather in end stage Alzheimer’s.
Did your child walk in, drop a bombshell, and blow the ground out from under you?
Has a family court judge stared down at you and
declared your husband free to choose sinful selfishness over you today?
Have you made the harder choices in life believing one
day the tipping point would come? It has come and tipped you into the depths of
an abyss you could never imagine.
Maybe you have cancer, and your employer said you no
longer have a job.
The depth of human misery represented in my community
of friends alone is staggering.
Courtesy Mad Penguin Creative
Is chaos crouching at the door? Are you weary? Can you
breathe?
Do you hear the voice of the accuser echoing in your
heart? He’s good. He’s had time to refine his act. He’s been practicing his
craft since he and creation’s Eve sized up that infamous, history changing tree
together.
He whispers just loud enough that you must strain to
hear him, but that’s part of his plan too. He’s reeling you in, closer. He
mocks.
Who
do you think you are? What right do you have to call yourself a person of faith?
Look at your life. That dude on television said you could have your best life
now. Is this your best? Really? Faker!
He stalks off leaving you to lick your wounds knowing
if he can defeat you now, his job just got easier. He knows we live in a world
filled with desperate folks who cannot breathe.
He looks over his shoulder snickering as he departs. If
he shuts you up, how many will remain oxygen deprived?
Courtesy Mad Penguin Creative
He uses your faith against you because that is your
tender spot. He tells you only perfect faith, all spiffed up and television shiny,
is the real deal.
Your faith is messy. Your life is messier. You are no
match for him. Sit down. Be quiet. Hide. Under your blanket. It’ll be better
that way.
The icy wind whipping down off the snowy mountain was
no match for the icy wind blowing over my soul today.
I reached out from under my soul-hiding blanket to
answer a text. Not long after, the phone rang. “Are you really o.k.? You aren’t,
are you?”
One messy soul-faith sister reached out to another. A
hint of air seeped into my lungs.
Courtesy Mad Penguin Creative
Strengthened by the call, I started to pay it forward. Before
I could hit send, an incoming text popped up.
“Just checking in. I love you, and I am praying.”
“Weird,” I answer back. “I was just texting you to ask
about you.”
“God,” she says. No further explanation needed.
Emboldened, I text a friend I met a year ago. I did not
expect to be forever friends. I never knew I would need her the way I did today
– as desperately as I did today.
She lives on the other side of the continent. In this
flat world, she is instantly available. “Pray?”
I pour out my heart in 140 character bursts.
Before I can blink, her answer pours out of my text
screen into my heart:
Courtesy Mad Penguin Creative
You
have not failed your God. Listen to the Lover of your soul. He’ll whisper
truth. He is at work in your life and in the life of your family. The truth:
when God sees you, he sees Jesus.
Big ugly gasping breaths fill my lungs as tears pour
down my cheeks. I can breathe.
I do not know who you are nor the cause and depth of the
pain you bear. I do know that hiding under a blanket of protection only serves to suffocate you.
It takes a while before you notice, but without warning
there is no air. In those desperately, lonely moments when we cannot breathe,
friends are God’s gift of CPR.
Our society makes it difficult to cultivate friends. I’ve
said so often, the more interconnected we are, the less connected we are.
If you are looking for air, please consider joining the
in(RL) community for a celebration of relationships on April 26th
and
Join us?
27th. Almost 500 groups are registered in 437 cities across the globe.
So far, over 1,000 women are planning to participate.
Won’t you be the next one to join us? You never know
when you may need a friend to help you breathe. To see the trailer and register, click here.
If you are gasping for breath, Desperate,
Hope for the Mom Who Needs to Breathe is chock full of wisdom and advice.
To learn more: click here.
