Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Monday Meet Up for the Desperate who Need to Breathe

I am desperate and cannot breathe. I am not alone.

Perhaps you have many little feet pattering around your home while taking care of an aging grandfather in end stage Alzheimer’s.

Did your child walk in, drop a bombshell, and blow the ground out from under you?

Has a family court judge stared down at you and declared your husband free to choose sinful selfishness over you today?

Have you made the harder choices in life believing one day the tipping point would come? It has come and tipped you into the depths of an abyss you could never imagine.

Maybe you have cancer, and your employer said you no longer have a job.

The depth of human misery represented in my community of friends alone is staggering.

Courtesy Mad Penguin Creative

Is chaos crouching at the door? Are you weary? Can you breathe?

Do you hear the voice of the accuser echoing in your heart? He’s good. He’s had time to refine his act. He’s been practicing his craft since he and creation’s Eve sized up that infamous, history changing tree together.

He whispers just loud enough that you must strain to hear him, but that’s part of his plan too. He’s reeling you in, closer. He mocks.

Who do you think you are? What right do you have to call yourself a person of faith? Look at your life. That dude on television said you could have your best life now. Is this your best? Really? Faker!

He stalks off leaving you to lick your wounds knowing if he can defeat you now, his job just got easier. He knows we live in a world filled with desperate folks who cannot breathe.

He looks over his shoulder snickering as he departs. If he shuts you up, how many will remain oxygen deprived?  
Courtesy Mad Penguin Creative 

He uses your faith against you because that is your tender spot. He tells you only perfect faith, all spiffed up and television shiny, is the real deal.

Your faith is messy. Your life is messier. You are no match for him. Sit down. Be quiet. Hide. Under your blanket. It’ll be better that way.

The icy wind whipping down off the snowy mountain was no match for the icy wind blowing over my soul today.

I reached out from under my soul-hiding blanket to answer a text. Not long after, the phone rang. “Are you really o.k.? You aren’t, are you?”

One messy soul-faith sister reached out to another. A hint of air seeped into my lungs.
Courtesy Mad Penguin Creative

Strengthened by the call, I started to pay it forward. Before I could hit send, an incoming text popped up.

“Just checking in. I love you, and I am praying.”

“Weird,” I answer back. “I was just texting you to ask about you.”

“God,” she says. No further explanation needed.  

Emboldened, I text a friend I met a year ago. I did not expect to be forever friends. I never knew I would need her the way I did today – as desperately as I did today.

She lives on the other side of the continent. In this flat world, she is instantly available. “Pray?” I pour out my heart in 140 character bursts.

Before I can blink, her answer pours out of my text screen into my heart:

Courtesy Mad Penguin Creative
You have not failed your God. Listen to the Lover of your soul. He’ll whisper truth. He is at work in your life and in the life of your family. The truth: when God sees you, he sees Jesus.

Big ugly gasping breaths fill my lungs as tears pour down my cheeks. I can breathe.

I do not know who you are nor the cause and depth of the pain you bear. I do know that hiding under a blanket of protection  only serves to suffocate you.

It takes a while before you notice, but without warning there is no air. In those desperately, lonely moments when we cannot breathe, friends are God’s gift of CPR.

Our society makes it difficult to cultivate friends. I’ve said so often, the more interconnected we are, the less connected we are.

If you are looking for air, please consider joining the in(RL) community for a celebration of relationships on April 26th and
Join us? 
27th. Almost 500 groups are registered in 437 cities across the globe. So far, over 1,000 women are planning to participate.

Won’t you be the next one to join us? You never know when you may need a friend to help you breathe.
To see the trailer and register, c
lick here

If you are gasping for breath, Desperate, Hope for the Mom Who Needs to Breathe is chock full of wisdom and advice. To learn more: click here


  1. You be careful, you're going to make me cry. This day has been one of those days!! (((HUGS)))

    1. Sarah, if you cry, I hope you know I am wiping your tears away virtually! Saw your BFF, Amy R. and it was almost as good as seeing both of you together.
      (( <3 ))

  2. Tears and hugs, Carol Anne. And much, much love. I'm still praying.

    1. Much love to you, and I know we depend upon one another's prayers.

  3. Can a guy chime in here? Thanks for your post. It is such a good reminder that we need our friends for our hard times. I have recently become a cancer patient. Something like this puts a whole new perspective on life. I wrote in my blog about friends (http://paulblais.blogspot.com/2013/03/i-love-you.html). I am finding that I need friends more than ever these days.
    Thanks again for your post.

  4. Thank you for this blog... I write a blog designed to encourage a particular group of women. Despite my Faith, His guidance, and experience with this group of women, I struggle with fear and doubt. I all too often accept ridicule as proof that I am not qualified to share His Word. But posts like this one, support from family and my closest friends, and His own enduring promise help me keep moving forward. Thank you!

  5. You didn't warn me that I would start this day off in tears. Tears because I want to reach out and give you a hug. Tears because I can relate. Tears because what you said is so true.

    1. Sharla, It has been my deepest honor to meet you and to hear about your ministry to the adoption community. You are brave. You are a hero. I am so thankful for friendships in far flung places because in my broken, weepy places, God uses friends like you to stand in my gaps. <3