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| 2010 |
The
prodding started several months ago, took me totally by surprise, and
happened over and over again. The Lord tapped me on the shoulder and
whispered, “Study to show yourself approved.” I knew the
application was not precise with regard to the scriptural context.
But, I also knew what he meant.
He
was telling me to slow down, be still, and listen. I've always been
in too big a hurry in my life. I want to get on with things and learn
as I go. Why slow down to study when on-the-job-training will get you
there? I've wasted too much time in my life which is, by anyone's
standards, at least half over now. Got to git to crackin', and can't slow down
no more!
I
was preparing for the Blue Ridge Mountain Christian Writers
Conference. While considering projects to pitch to an editor or
publisher, I reviewed my work for possible contest entries as well. After
all, I've been pretty prolific with posting to this blog the last
year. Surely, there was something I had worth pitching or entering.
Only a slacker wouldn't pitch and/or enter, and I'm no slacker!
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| Courtesy Mad Penguin Creative |
I'd sit here night after night going back and forth with myself like a tennis ball at Wimbledon. Just as I'd decide on an answer, the voice would echo in my head and heart like a warning beacon telling me to alter my course of action. “Study to show yourself approved.”
What
was God trying to tell me, and why would he slow me down in my
progress toward fame, fortune, and an internationally known presence
in the publishing world? Yes, in my wildest dreams, I am 'all that'.
You'd think God would be on board with my plan by now too!
Apparently, he is a memo or two short regarding my grand empty nester
plan!
Time
evaporated, and it was too late to craft a pitch or enter a contest.
I fretted and worried over whether I was wasting my sponsor's
investment in me. Shouldn't I be more goal-oriented given what my big
brother/sponsor has done to foster my writing career? “Study to
show yourself approved,” echoed the voice in my soul.
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| Courtesy A. Hughes |
In
the end, I bit off more than I could chew. I've done that since I was
in junior high school and learning how to sew! I decided to devote my
mornings to a fiction practicum and my afternoons to one on
non-fiction writing. Good thing I like pie, 'cause I sure ate a lot
of one filled with humble-berries! Bless Ramona Richards and Eva Marie Everson for the gift of their time and attention to a fraidy
cat like me!
Just
as I feared, my classmates were much farther along on their own projects. I felt like I had a big, fat 'L' (for 'loser') tattooed
on my forehead before the week was over. Glad I listened when God
kept whispering that I needed to apply myself to the pursuit of
wisdom. I was even more thankful I had reigned in my
inclination to pitch and enter when what I needed to do was be quiet
and ponder.
God
had a different, far more satisfying, agenda for me this year.
Because I was not tied up in knots of anticipation vying for faculty
appointments or waiting for the awards ceremony, I felt peaceful and
free. I was free to sit and soak up the information I gained in the
classes without underlying anxiety to distract me. Beyond that, I was
free to focus on the people with whom God so graciously surrounded
me.
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| Courtesy Mad Penguin Creative |
How
could I have known the sweet, sweet gifts he would supply in the
midst of my obedience? Even tonight I am in awe of what he planned.
Divine appointments with special people paved my daily path. He had
prepared me for those moments by freeing me of an urgent agenda to
prove myself a writer worthy of either attention or acclamation.
I
am thankful for the faculty that devoted themselves to my enrichment
as a budding writer. I am thankful for peers who challenged me to
raise my game. Most of all, I am thankful for the relationships
fostered that have strengthened and encouraged me in ways I never
could have imagined before last week. I am a rich, rich girl
indeed. In fact, I can't imagine that Harry Potter's 'mamma' (J. K.
Rowling) is any richer than am I tonight!
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| Courtesy B. Creasy 2010 |
2
Timothy 2:15 (International Standard Version)
Do
your best to present yourself to God as an approved worker who has
nothing to be ashamed of, handling the word of truth with precision.
Well, you know what they say... "Bite off more than you can chew, then chew like hell!" You keep up the great work, I believe God has big plans for you my friend!
ReplyDeleteOh, Jenny! I was so out of my league given the spectacular classmates and projects they have underway! I'll be chewing for a long time! I am thankful for the way the classes functioned as iron sharpening iron for me! BRMCWC is an incredible experience given the stellar faculty who give so freely of their time, experience, and talent. I will forever be indebted to my brother for making my attendance possible!
DeleteYou did great! And you will continue to do so ... LOVED having you in my class.
ReplyDeleteEva Marie
Eva, I loved BEING in your class because of your patient leadership/teaching and because of the other incredible students. My vision is clarified, and I have a sense of purpose I didn't have before your practicum. What fraidy cat could ask for more?
DeleteCarole Anne, I remember feeling like I was in a race to get published after I completed my first novel, and it quickly became frustrating when I didn't and still haven't seen what the world considers "success". However, I have learned so much more about my story, my characters, and my strengths and weaknesses as a writer because I have had to wait and hone my craft everyday. The world tells us to chase after our dreams no matter what the cost to our souls. The Word tells us to chase after a God who has dreamed bigger for us than we could have ever imagined. I think I'll stick with the latter. :) I absolutely loved this post, and I know I'm not the only one that needed to remember to be still and study to show myself approved.
ReplyDeleteYou just bless me to the point of tears every time we interact. I TOLD your mamma she raised you right! ;-) I was especially moved by your private comments re how Satan would destroy our message especially if it is one others need to hear. You hit the nail on the head re my feelings as I returned home. Who in the world would want to hear my stale old story and why. Why bother formulating a book from the blog, etc. I'm so thankful for you and my other 'Monday' girls. You all mean the world to me!
Delete